For the moment, you can call me “sojourner,” as I’ve decided, at least for now, to leave my name out of the mix. There is nothing to hide and many will come here knowing precisely who I am, but if at all possible, I would like to keep the focus on “the journey.”
Here, I’ll offer an introduction into who I am, or at least share some of what I know thus far. One of the best places to begin is … at a beginning. Yes, my birth. Specifically, I’m speaking of my birth “chart” … the astrological compilation of symbols that depict how the sky appeared at the moment I was born. Now, the mere mention of astrology can often draw sighs and sneers, but that’s quite alright with me. Read on if you so desire. My intention is not to get into the nitty-gritty of detail, but to paint a picture with sweeping strokes, as if I’m preparing a canvas for the great work.
And so we begin with the Sun. This powerful symbol arose for me in Virgo, in the 8th house. The Sun is the centerpiece of this grand universe, and as would seem “logical,” it would have a similar meaning in one’s nativity. So, the “essence” of this sojourner is a servant … particular in most things, analytical, and on the darker side, when the reins are released, critical.
But what about the “8th house?” This is part of what drew me to take a closer look into the wonders of astrology. In this lifetime, my Sun settled into this house with full intent to shine there. Each “house” of the astrological wheel represents an “area of activity” … and the 8th house centers on topics of “transformation” … including, in part, death, sex, and in general, digging below the surface. My attention was/is especially drawn to the latter phrase. During the course of my life, I’ve often wondered why I was so intrigued by the “unseen” while many others didn’t seem to give a damn. This gave me a hint as to “why.”
Although I am adamant that one should always consider the “whole” chart vs. picking and choosing pieces here and there, for the sake of brevity, I will only mention two other aspects that are usually noted as being “key” – the moon and rising sign. The former is under the sign of Leo, the lion. In the Myers/Briggs personality inventory, I have consistently tested out as an “I”/Introvert … and although, over the years, I’ve moved closer to the center (towards “E”/Extrovert), I still need solitude to re-charge. The moon is said to be tied to our personality … so you would expect someone with a Leo moon to be, well … like a lion. Now, would you (typically) associate a lion with being a servant? Likely not … but that is, in short, how I’m wired. Years ago, someone commented, “when you enter a room, you have a commanding presence.” That statement struck me a bit odd … not that I disagreed completely, but I know that my tendency is toward “the back of the room” … where all the servants are. As for the rising sign, on the moment I was born, Capricorn was “sitting” on the horizon. The first glimpse of the day … and at “first glimpse”, I carry the “appearance” of Capricorn, who, suffice it to say, can be a rather focused fellow … much in keeping with the “intensity” I’ve been known to display.
As I have been writing, I realize a bit more about why I’m drawn to create this site. Imagine if you will someone who loves to dig below the surface, into and past the questions, deeper. With a servant’s heart, he’s filled with an urge to share everything he’s experiencing. He wants to stand on the mountaintop and roar … but he’s become sensitive to the glazed look that would often overtake people’s eyes if he went further than they wanted to go. He has no desire to proselytize. So, what better way to share than by providing a venue where those people may come and go as they please?
Throughout the writings on this site you will surely gather a great deal about how I think and who I am, but I would like to take a moment to lay a bit more foundation. To this point, you know that I embrace astrology as a viable tool for understanding more about one’s Self. But there are many other “tools” I have picked up during the course of this journey. Although I did not have a “religious” upbringing, when I was 25, I had an experience that led me to become a Christian. It was a profound experience, one that led me to about 15 years of involvement in “the church” … even to the point of spending three years as a full-time youth pastor. During those years, I was “introduced” to the inner realms … skirting the shadows, at times overcoming fear long enough to face aspects of myself. As with all endeavors, you reap what you sow, and I, in most instances, was willing to follow Spirit’s lead. Those years had a profound impact on my inner growth. They were years I would never trade away. But I ended up leaving the church … about the same time I left my marriage, both of which are stories better left for another day.
The years immediately following were filled with highs and lows, not unlike each of you have encountered in your journey. With each moment, situations arose and decisions were made. Tagging each with “good,” “bad,” “right,” or “wrong” doesn’t seem to be helpful at this juncture. Irregardless of perception, I have a strong sense that no matter our choice, we are guided precisely where we need to be. (Spend some time with that and see if you’re not humbled a bit.) As it turns out, some of my greatest strides were made when “pain” strolled to my door and decided to stay a while. (Oh, and when “he” comes, he always brings a mirror.) Springing from those “visitations,” I inevitably found healing hidden in the tears.
The two daughters I share this journey with are my dearest friends. As well, I count them joyfully among the inspirational teachers who have crossed my path … and fortunately, we still walk together. They accept me as I am, and although we may perceive the greys of life a bit differently at times, there is an openness that I trust will always remain.
When I walked away from the church about 15 years ago, I continued to explore within, albeit on paths foreign to them. I realized moments of great joy and utter foolishness … and was able to share much with these dear souls. Through the years, I came upon many teachings, from the Native Americans, A Course in Miracles, Buddhism, and Carl Jung, to name a few, that offered assistance as I sojourned along the inner (and outer) paths. But throughout, although I would, at times, excitedly gush with one “epiphany” or another, I never insisted they “come” my way. It seems I’ve been blessed with a gift of sorts … the ability to truly release others to their own paths. Sure, I will gladly share what I have come to know/believe, but I’ve recognized that we’re all in process. I trust we’re all right where we need to be … at least for the moment. This brings to mind a quote from Paul Foster Case who, in his “Meditations on the Tarot,” wrote, “Woe unto them who condemn these my works unfinished.” (p.10)
Speaking of Mr. Case, he was the founder of a group (BOTA) I encountered about six or seven years ago through a rather curious series of events. His work centers on the “Western Mystery Tradition,” utilizing the Tree of Life, Astrology, and the Tarot as key tools for understanding more about one’s self and this amazing journey we’re all on. This “path” resonated with me in an instant. In many ways, it was like I had come home. And what I eventually found is that it brought me back to “The Christ” in a far more expansive way than I ever could have imagined … reminding me there is a Golden Thread subtly woven through the fabric of the religions this world has conjured.
And finally, a couple of general comments:
- I am forever a student … because there’s OH so much to know … or better yet, remember!
- I ask a lot of questions.
- I have a writing style that may or may not be acceptable to some.
- I’m perfectly imperfect, though intent on becoming fully the man I Am intended to be.
- And finally, I’m more playful than I may appear in type. 🙂